Drunk History celebrated with “Drunk Developer: Bitcoin Edition”

We all know that those who have the most to say are usually drunk, so why not take advantage of this slurring verbosity and get the most out of our alcohol? This “Drunk History” concept is not ours, it is that of Derek Waters and the intrepid team at the website Funny or Die. I’m not hyperlinking you there because you’ll leave and not come back for hours. Google it later. First, join a drunken Pat “P-Fro” Ramsey and a cast of elite actors to learn more about Bitcoin. Bitcoin is the cryptocurrency that’s becoming quite popular amongst investors, consumers and retailers.

Drunk Developer soars above the often dry and boring jargon of giddy tech evangelists to share inside information on the hot, new peer-to-peer money. —Satoshi Nakamoto

With help from our good friends at Highland Mist (about 7 shots) and several pints of beer, you’ll understand more about how you too can make money with Bitcoin. Also, you’ll discover why it’s important to chew and most likely a thing or two about the importance of moderation.


Patrick Ramsey as The Drunk Developer

John Rupp as The Retailer

Ryan Clarey as The DDoS Attack

Nic Steinbach as The Peripheral DDoS Attack

Adam Jensen as Sathoshi Nakamoto

Caroline Temple as Patrick Ramsey

Sean Baxter as Sean Baxter

Jared Ewy as Jared Ewy

Important people: Ashley “Spoon Smiley” Forker, Patrick “P-Mo” Moroney, Steve “Donatelli” Donatelli, Kyle “Fuzzy” Robbins, Ben “Ping Pain” Wenger, Alex “Kehr Package” Kehr, Shannon “Shamazon” Brown, and Ethan “Blaine” Conley

What happens on a Google Doc

At we use Google Docs ugh fine Google Drive all the time to collaborate on projects. Most of the time these collaborative documents are free of any shenanigans, but every now and then a shenanigan party breaks out.

That was the case Tuesday, when everyone in the office had access to a company potluck signup spreadsheet and several people were making edits at once. Click through for full size and behold the shenanigans.

Screen Shot 2013-07-16 at 9.38.52 AMWe have a non sequitur column header about color choice (perhaps aMonty Python reference?). We have people signing up to bring NNOOTTHHIINNGG!, tap water, and early ’90s rap classics. We also have a discussion about whether or not kids would be on the potluck menu.

And we had a few well-adjusted human beings offering to bring actual dishes to the potluck, so that was nice.

The startup culture scavenger hunt

We’ve poked fun at startup culture in recent weeks (like here, here, and here), but we’re not exactly wearing suits and ties and sitting in a maze of cubicles. may not be a true startup these days, but we’ve got some startup tendencies.

1. Interns

Startups love interns. They especially love unpaid interns. But we’ve only got one intern: Alex Kehr*, who brings us coffee and serves as a makeshift footrest for our marketing manager, Ashley Forker. This will look great on his résumé.


*Alex also handles our social media accounts.

Selling sex isn’t as easy as it looks

We like to give our competition a hard time about selling sex and objectifying women. It’s kind of what they’re known for.

But sometimes we’re willing to climb off our high horse and succumb to the latest marketing trends. We’re willing to sell sex, too. Trouble is, we don’t have Danica Patrick or Bar Rafaeli on our side.

We just have this guy:

The community evangelist in his natural sexy habitat.

The community evangelist and aspiring sex symbol in his natural habitat.

That’s Jared Ewy, our community evangelist. He may not fit into YOUR definition of sexy, but at we believe beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

In Jared’s words, “Sexy is so hot. It’s the flesh, the curves, round things. And nature. I think. Yeah, I think nature is sexy, but I’m not sure how you consummate that…”

I couldn’t have said it better myself. We think Jared can make sexy work. Armed with little more than a ball gag and self confidence, Jared gave this “selling sex” thing the old college try at a recent Demand Media meeting. You know, to test the waters.

As you can see, the reaction was less than favorable. It went over about as well as Jared’s recent venture into hipster culture. Maybe you do need a traditionally attractive woman, millions of dollars worth of Super Bowl airtime, and a complete lack of taste if you want to sell sex effectively. We only had one of the three.

So I guess we’ll just have to go back to focusing on providing our customers with world-class customer support. If nothing else, it’ll save Jared from some awkward conversations with the TSA.

The Best Super Bowl Commercials. We parody one that is not.

It was the ultimate Superbowl Sunday. The game was good (except for that awful missed call in the end zone) and we can all feel good that the losing Harbaugh brother can at least be happy for the other, winning Harbaugh brother. It was also nice to see some decent commercials. Companies paid upwards of $4 million bucks for their thirty-second ad, so you’d hope that they’d air something to remember. Right now, in kind of a loose top six, we have fond memories of:

Samsung’s Next Big Thingsuperbowl ad samsung

Budweiser’s Horse Love Ad

Space Babies from Kia

Amy Poehler for Best Buy

Tide’s Joe Montana Stain

And we’ll even admit that GoDaddy did a good job with their .CO “your big idea” commercial. We’ll share it with you as long as come to to get that idea online. To be honest, it was a little bit weird for us to see them do something so…so not bad. We thrive on their bad ideas, so it was with a great amount of disgusted relief when we saw their #TheKiss ad featuring supermodel Bar Rafaeli, and ubiquitous geeky movie extra, Jesse Heiman. A nerd getting a kiss is a victory for all of us in the web industry, but to have it as wet and close as that one…well, we had to do a parody.

super bowl commercials

We got the whole company involved in a brain storm, and from an initial idea, @OwenBorseth, our VP of Awesome, said that the kissing “sounded like someone eating a cantaloupe.” And then Nick Salvadore, who was at home with his awesome wife, son and their new baby girl, chimed in to say the cantaloupe was the best idea.

So we went with that. And the Twitter went nuts.

godaddy kiss response

Oh, and this…

godaddy superbowl commercial

We heard from many, many more people who were happy to have an outlet about a Superbowl commercial gone awry. The shot didn’t need to be that close. It didn’t need all the sucking sounds. With a heaping amount of thanks to Stephen Donatelli and Patrick “P-Mo” Moroney  (@brandnamebob on Twitter) for being our “kissers,” we mobilized the entire office to take part in our parody of #TheKiss commercial.

So that happened and for about zero dollars. Although we did splurge on a 4-dollar melon at Whole foods.

Elevator Ghost Prank, Gangnam Style Christmas Lights, Kate Middleton Pregnant on trenD

This is the news you can use and how to use the news. Domain names abound for the biggest stories, including Kate Middleton’s pregnancy, the most frightening prank in history and Christmas lights gone Gangnam Style. Actually, I think a Gangnam Style Christmas would be a blast. You’d have horsey dancing during carols, dangerous boat rides, hot tubbing and random explosions. Also known as just another night with Lindsay Lohan. We have a brief bit on her too…

Rated R for Royalty

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